I'm fairly certain I saw something between Away We Go and the movie I'm reviewing in this blog, but my list is at home and I can't recall what that movie is. I'll have to pick it back up tomorrow with the one I think I skipped.
Today is not going well. The following is the chronology of my day in the 4 hours I've been awake:
1.Wake up 20 minutes late.
2. Wearing glasses in the pouring rain.
3. Takes an hour and forty minutes to get to work as opposed to one hour.
4. Parking lot one building away is full so we have to park completely across campus in an uncovered lot.
5. Find out the video project I left over night didn't work so I have to start all over.
6. Least favorite customer of all time is my first customer of the day; informs me he'll be in every day this week
I'll update readers on whether or not I can add to the list. Misery loves company, but if I've learned anything it's that it also loves more misery.
Awaited Blu-Ray release of the day: Orange County (and, if I'm not mistaken, Jack Black is in the lead regarding the tally of actors in what is essentially a list of crummy movies)
As for my music video of the day, I wouldn't call this their best song--that distinction goes to Black, coincidentally after naming Jack Black our king of bad movies--but this is the first song of theirs that I heard and it's incredibly addicting. Great lyrics, great melody, all around great song: Our Life is Not a Movie or Maybe by Okkervil River.
#16: Up
There are three types of movies for which there seems to be a gag order when it comes to speaking ill of them: Racism movies, Holocaust movies, and Disney Pixar movies. I say "Enough." I'm breaking the silence.
I am so tired of Disney Pixar movies. Honestly the organization could release a three hour film on the benefits of drinking and driving and it would be praised by every critic and viewer with two thumbs to put up. It's just animation, people. I don't understand.
I know that Disney films to begin with aren't particularly creative. Snow White, Cinderella, Pocahontas et al are all basically interchangeable, but the difference is they're acknowledged as charming little childhood memories one can't help but love. Whatever Pixar movie is coughed up every year ends up heralded as groundbreaking cinema for all ages to enjoy...or else. There is nothing especially notable about any of them besides the early ones that were, in fact, new, exciting, and creative. Toy Story, for example, will never grow tiresome. On the other hand, does anyone remember Cars? No? It's because it wasn't a good movie. And yet it still was nominated for countless awards and made boatloads of money in ticket and merchandise sales the year it came out.
That's my Disney Pixar rant. As for Up, specifically, I went into it with an open mind remembering the movies I really enjoyed like Monsters, Inc. I also went into it having had how UNBELIEVABLE it was shoved down by throat by every friend and acquaintance that crossed my path. I was able to shut those voices out last year when the name WALL-E rattled in my ear drums for what seemed like 6 months, but I decided to relent in this case--particularly for the 3-D.
I could have simply written "Profound waste of money" and published my blog but I should explain myself. First of all, anything can be advertised in 3-D. In fact, if I ever run out of hilarious potential Blu-Ray releases, I will start a "Movies that should be released in 3-D" list. Essentially I paid an extra $4 to see a 2-D movie wearing ridiculous 3-D glasses that gave me a headache. One scene--ONE SCENE--was noticeably 3-D and the rest were simply slightly raised figures on a blurry background. It's obvious that this was yet another ploy to make a profit both because people are more inclined to see a 3-D movie (I saw My Bloody Valentine, didn't I?) and because viewers have to pay $4 for 3-D glasses that probably cost $0.75 to make.
Even without the issue of the fake 3-D this movie isn't good. There are films with an annoying character, but this film boasts three distractingly annoying characters--that damn boy scout, that damn talking dog, and that other damn talking dog. Annoying characters with annoying voices do not an entertaining movie make. No character is likeable here. By the end of the film I had lost all of the sympathy I had for the old man because I was so frustrated with every character in the movie. All I heard from everyone is "Oh my God, the beginning of Up is sooooooooooo sad!!" Let me do you one better: the whole movie is sad.
One of the biggest complaints I have about the movie is its refusal to commit to being realistic or fantastic. The concept--a man flying a house with balloons--is obviously unreal, but the creators attempted to justify it by giving an elaborate justification for how he rigged the system. A talking dog is similarly unreal (and, in my opinion, unnecessary) but rather than simply pulling a Disney and having a talking dog they offered a half-assed explanation as to why dogs were talking in the movie. Personally I feel as if it might have served the creators better simply to acknowledge the plot as inherently fantastic and spend less time trying to compensate for holes.
Admittedly the opening of the film was an effective emotional appeal; it was actually somewhat more heavy-handed than I anticipated from a Disney film. I know that we've seen (spoiler alert!) Simba's father and Bambi's mother die, but here there was something more proximal about the death that made it somewhat harder to swallow. It was realistic in that the death came of old age rather than some unfortunate circumstance, which is different than the typical Disney plot.
I can appreciate, also, that the film didn't harp on the depressing dimension of the plot as that would have been daunting for the audience. It established motive for the main character and although it was periodically reiterated it wasn't until the end that the real heartbreaker came. The film actually has me somewhat concerned that Disney will have to become increasingly depressing to captivate audiences the way they so obviously hope to.
I'm not sure if the movie would be so disappointing had it not received a rave review from every single person that saw it. I was expecting something really uplifting (and no, I'm too disappointed for that to be an intentional pun) but I was far too overwhelmed by the shortcomings and faults of the movie that I hardly remember any of the positives. So let me be likely the first person you hear proclaim "I didn't like Up" and "I'm tired of Pixar." And if I'm dead by morning, you know Walt made it happen.
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